Box of Dreams
by FictionAficionada
Summary: Donna and Harvey have danced around their feelings for each other for too long but with all the changes going on, can they finally admit to what they feel? He's finally made managing partner and thinks about what comes next in his life and who he wants in it, while Donna is still reeling from the consequences of Stephen Huntley. Will she ever break her cardinal rule again?
1. Chapter 1

_Hello Readers!_

_I had started toying around with the story earlier in this season but as the episodes came out each week things began to change a little. Just an FYI this story takes place over until the last episodes of season 3, but for this story we will ignore the blunder that was the pairing of Harvey and Dana during the last episode._

_I do not own any of the characters from suits. All rights to characters and plot lines are owned by the writers of Suits on USA._

_Enjoy!_

* * *

Harvey stepped out of the Pearson-Darby building, basking in the glow of their latest victory. Ava's murder charges were dropped, Darby would be shipped back across the pond, and Stephen Huntley was out of his hair. Then he saw her, standing on the curb by his car, and felt his excitement deflate. She was tough but he knew that the whole debacle with Stephen was as shocking as having a bucket of ice cold water dumped on her. She put on a smile as he approached but he could see it was still a front. The smile failed to reflect in her eyes, like it usually did when she was particularly excited about something. He cursed Stephen Huntley in his mind and smiled inwardly as he remembered kicking his ass thoroughly just a few days before. Smug bastard deserved it and much more, he thought to himself.

Harvey may have made the mistake last year of not having fought for Donna when she was fired from Pearson-Hardman but he sure as hell wasn't going to let it happen again. He fought for her this time, literally. Though he may never admit it out loud to anyone, beating the pulp out of Stephen was all for her and now he hoped to lock up the bastard for life.

"Donna," he said as he approached, giving her a soft smile.

"Harvey," she returned.

"How did it go?"

"It's done," she said firmly.

Harvey nodded and observed her quietly. She had asked him if she could be the one to deliver the news to Stephen about his arrest and he obliged. He knew that despite the tough exterior she always tried to put on that she was broken inside.

"Take the car," he offered, "I think I feel like a walk tonight."

She nodded softly and gave a sad smile as she ducked into the car.

"Goodnight, Harvey," she said, looking up at him.

"Goodnight, Donna," he replied as he shut the car door gently and watched as Ray pulled the car away from the curb.

He turned around and began walking, not really sure where he'd end up.

* * *

The office was quiet without Donna around, too quiet. He always felt a little bit helpless when she was gone. He caught himself letting his gaze drift over to her desk a few times, as though she would magically appear if he looked hard enough. Two weeks had gone by since Stephen's arrest and she had been through a lot and deserved a few days to herself, days he was sure she did not want to spend at home, where she had spent time with Stephen. Harvey felt his jaw set and lock into place as he thought of the two of them. It had bothered him when she told him she was sleeping with him and though he finally admitted to her that it bothered him, he wasn't sure she knew just how much and why. He offered her his house in the Hamptons for the week and though she insisted it wasn't necessary, Harvey insistence was much greater than hers and she conceded.

The day was winding down when Mike sauntered into his office at a quarter past 8, a stack of files in his hands. He dropped the files on Harvey's desk, the thud startling Harvey from his thoughts. He let his gaze linger on Donna's desk for a second too long when he noticed his associate eyeing him curiously. He cleared his throat and turned to face him now.

"Did you get those financials from Louis on Folsom Foods?" he asked.

"It's all there," the associate answered, "Along with the financials for Hessington Oils."

"Good," he responded, picking up the first file and flipping through it absentmindedly.

"So," Mike began casually, "Where's Donna?"

"On vacation," he responded with disinterest without looking up from the file in front of him.

"I see," he replied slowly, cautiously. Though he had said no more, Harvey could feel Mike's gaze fixed on him.

"What?" he asked annoyed.

"Nothing, nothing," the associate responded quickly and plopped down on the couch in Harvey's office, stealing a glance at Donna's desk and back to Harvey again.

"So…did she go on vacation alone?" he prodded once more, with his best attempt at casual disinterest.

Harvey pressed his lips into a thin line and took a deep breath, Mike was testing his patience, he was sure of it.

"I don't know nor do I care what Donna does in her own personal time. This isn't the sophomore locker room."

"Yeah, sure seemed like you didn't care when you beat the shit out of Stephen for her," he muttered sarcastically under his breath.

Harvey slammed the file down on his desk, looking up at Mike, irritation evident in his expression.

"I'm sorry, do I pay you to work cases for me or do I pay you to make empirical observations about my life? And before you give me some smart ass remark, let me clue you in; if you want to start dropping some Freudian slip bullshit on me, your ass is out of here! And another thing, I kicked Stephen's ass because he deserved every bit of it for bringing his filth into this firm. Now get out!"

Mike snapped his mouth shut and sighed, shaking his head slowly. He turned toward the door and stopped before exiting.

"Can I just ask you one thing?" he said turning around once more, unable to let go of whatever thought plagued him.

"No" Harvey snapped.

Mike nodded slowly, sizing up his boss and considering the likelihood of his threats.

"Well, I'm going to ask it anyway and then I'm going to leave," he countered.

"What are you going to do about it, Harvey?"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

Mike gave his boss a pointed look and sighed when all he got was a vacant and irritated glare back. He turned, shutting the door to the office before continuing.

"I'm talking about Donna! Look, I know it's not my place…"

"You're right, it's not your place!" he snapped back at Mike.

"No, it isn't but do you know that the only reason you have a confession from Stephen Huntley that Dana Scott was not involved in this whole mess is because Donna went in there and outsmarted him into a confession?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Three days ago, Donna asked me to go with her to see Stephen. She got him to admit that Dana had no knowledge of his and Darby's plans. Do you know why she did it? For you! Because for some weird reason, this woman sacrifices her happiness in order for you to be happy. And on top of it all she thinks that Dana Scott is what will make you happy."

Harvey's head was reeling and he found it difficult to comprehend what Mike was implying. Taking advantage of his boss' silence, the young associate continued.

"Let me just give you a reality check, Harvey. You were right when you said you weren't the guy I should go to if I needed advice on relationships. So let me give you some advice. If any good came from this whole thing with Stephen, it should have been to show you that Donna is not going to be around forever! You will not be number one in her life forever. Someday some man will come around and give her everything she needs, and the days of you being number one in her life will be over and you are going to wind up alone and bitter about it, even if you're too proud to admit it. The only reason it hasn't happened yet is because she hasn't let it; she's been too busy over the past decade helping you achieve _**your**_ goals."

"She's not going to wait around forever, Harvey. You've got your name on the door now, so now what? You've achieved everything you've wanted but what about her? Do you think she is just going to stay here keeping your life all neat and tidy and pass up on living her life? Handbags and bonuses will only go so far. Stephen was just the first sign of her really coming to the realization that she needs more than this and she deserves it. And when the day comes, that she lets someone in to her life, however much you think you dislike Stephen Huntley, you'll dislike this guy a thousand times more, because he will have the one person who knew all your wants and needs before you even knew them yourself! He's going to have the only woman you've ever been able to really love but have been too proud and too self-centered to let her know!"

"Hey, that's enough!" he snapped back angrily now, rising up from his seat, "I never asked Donna not to live her life! And she knows that!"

"You're right…you would never ask that of her. You would just expect it of her. Telling her would mean you'd have to show some semblance of emotion and feelings toward her and God forbid the great Harvey Specter ever do that! Donna has been focused on her job for the past 12 years Harvey, but her job is you! Her focus is always on you! How can any other man ever compete with that? If your relationship with her is really meant to just be a platonic thing, then that's fine, but everyone around you two can see it's more than that. And her trying to set the scene for a happy ending between you and Dana, that's her trying to run from whatever she feels, that she's undoubtedly been pushing away for years. She's been more faithful and loyal to you than people I know who have been married a lifetime! And why the best closer in New York can't manage to close that deal is beyond me!"

"I don't know who you think you are and I don't know what kind of impression I've given you but let me make this clear to you: Whatever happens or does not happen between me and Donna is none of your business or anyone else's in this company! Your business is to research these goddamn cases and if that's too complicated for you, then I can show you the door!" Harvey shouted, finally finding words.

Mike stared at his boss in silence for a moment and dug his hands into his pockets before releasing a sigh and shaking his head.

"That's all I had to say," he said turning toward the glass door but paused before stepping out, "Oh, and if you want to say that you beat the shit out of Stephen because he deserved it, fine. But if you want to claim that the reason he deserved it has nothing to do with Donna…well then I'd have to say that's bullshit!"

With that he turned and walked away from his boss' office, leaving Harvey in silence.

Harvey took his seat again, fuming now. He picked up another one of the files Mike had brought over and began paging through it, trying to clear his mind of that conversation. Now that Mike had cracked that whole subject wide open though, it was hard to think of anything else.

"Son of a bitch!" he cursed under his breath as he slammed the folder back down on his desk.

He turned his chair to face the window. He stared out at the city skyline but focused on nothing in particular as his mind raced plagued by Mike's words.

Harvey had already seen what his life had been like without Donna last year; dark and ugly. When Mike had said that Donna had be loyal to him longer than most couples he knew that were married, the kid really had no idea just how loyal. Harvey recalled their time back at the DA's office and remembered how Donna had been the one to pull his head out of his ass when she saw that he was risking going down the unscrupulous path that Cameron Dennis had been paving for him.

He shuddered to think of where he would be now if it hadn't been for her. He wasn't perfect, far from it, but without her he would probably be a man his father would be ashamed of. She was more than just his assistant, much more, but what exactly would you call it?

The default answer was always that he was her boss and she was his employee but it sounded so impersonal as he spoke it in his mind. Harvey knew somewhere deep down that as much as he showered her with gifts and bonuses, that the space he took in her life left a gap in her that he had not filled and that could not be filled with all the Marni bags in the world. It was the space that Mike alluded to in his rant, that space that another man could someday take.

And if truth be told, the real truth, Harvey had to admit that he had been pretty selfish. For everything she gave up for him, he hadn't given the same up for her. And he knew that Mike was right, someday someone would come along and she would really let them in and he would lose her, he would lose everything.

Harvey Specter didn't do relationships though, he didn't really know how to. But something had to give if he didn't want to risk losing Donna forever. She had numerous proposals come her way, this was true, and it was only a matter of time before she finally said yes to one and made that binding tie to another man.

But as he sat there, adrift in his thoughts, another one nagged at him. _She didn't break the rule for you. She broke it for Stephen._ The policy, she called it. Her one rule. She didn't get involved with her coworkers. He thought back to the one time they broke that cardinal rule of hers. Technically they were no longer coworkers, she had left the DA's office unable to work for Cameron Dennis' corrupt ways, and he had been working his move over to Pearson-Hardman. When he showed up at her door that night, all bets were off and all kinds of rules had been broken. He smiled to himself as he recalled that night ten years ago.

He came to her days later, asking her to join him at Pearson-Hardman, because he didn't want to know the kind of lawyer he would be without her. He saw a brief flicker of disappoint flash in her eyes in that moment but as his career needs were always greater than anything else, he had pushed it aside. But being Donna, she quickly recovered and finally agreed on the condition that they never let their rendezvous be spoken of again.

She once told him, "If you were ever lucky enough to have me, you'd never want to share." And she was right because even in the way he had her now, he could never think of sharing her with anyone, much less letting her go.

"Nice to see I pay you so much to let you sit around daydreaming," came the voice from behind him, stirring him from his thoughts.

"Jessica," he said turning around in his chair to face his boss, "Listen, I need to take a few days to take care of some things."

Jessica raised her eyebrows, "Harvey, we are in the middle of the dissolution of this merger, I need you here and I need you focused."

"Jessica, I am focused, but I need to do this. If you need me, I'll have my phone and laptop with me, and I'm within two hours of the city."

"Can this not wait?" she asked impatiently.

"No," he answered firmly, "I've already waited ten years."

A look of understanding crossed Jessica Pearson's face, "Donna?" she asked.

Harvey nodded silently but with conviction.

"Fine. But if the shit hits the fan over here while you are out, you will need to get your ass back to this firm."

Harvey nodded quickly, without another word, grabbing his laptop and headed out of his office.

"About damn time," Jessica said, a smile playing on her lips as Harvey moved quickly out the door.

* * *

He needed to go to her and he needed to do it now. Now that he had allowed himself to admit it he didn't want to waste another minute. This wasn't about finding out what kind of lawyer he would be in ten years if she weren't around; it was about making sure he didn't find out what kind of man he would be in ten years if she were no longer an integral part of his daily life.

Somewhere along their ten-plus years together, the admiration and respect he felt for her became something more and he had rarely allowed himself to tread those waters, until now. He wasn't sure what she felt though but hoped that for putting up with all of his crap over all these years that it had to mean that she felt a little something. She had worked avidly at getting him to reconcile with Scotty and she claimed she wasn't in love with him but he supposed that if he were in her position, he wouldn't have admitted it a year ago either. He had never given her any reason to feel like she could tell him as much.

He stopped by Donna's desk on his way out and picked up a few items he needed. When he left the Pearson-Darby-Specter office, the moon had started to make its rise over Manhattan. He sped home and packed a light bag made his way to the garage and into his car. He sat in the driver's seat for a minute considering whether or not to turn the ignition. He wasn't sure how this would all play out or what the hell he would even do once he got there but he couldn't wait until next week for her to return to find out.

Stay tuned for the next chapter.


	2. Chapter 2

It was well after midnight by the time Harvey pulled into the sweeping driveway of his Hampton's retreat. At first glance the beachfront property appeared to be nothing more than an eclectic mix of modernist boxes stacked and offset from one another. It was a geometric twist for a house in East Hampton but it was a perfect fit for Harvey Specter. Geometry, glass, and a great view had been his specifications. Cedar, Stone, Steel, and Glass played off each other in clean cut lines that provided balance and translucency. But it wasn't until pulling into the drive of the three bedroom bungalow that one could fully admire the beauty of the house. The contrast of the house to its surroundings did not make it an eye-sore but instead it seemed more organic than the traditional surrounding properties. Light filtered through vast panoramic glass walls providing a natural source of light for most hours of the day. Retractable glass walls transformed closed spaces into ones that merged with the environment that surrounded it. The final touch to an eye-catching exterior was provided by a section of the first floor rotated at an angle, with a small section of the second floor cantilevered above it, overlooking a mahogany pool deck leading out the beach.

Harvey noted that though the accent lights were on, the house on the inside was in complete darkness. He considered for a moment whether Donna could be out. He was here now though he thought and might as well go in and find out.

He walked into the house noticing that all was quiet. He switched on a set of accent lights along the staircase to the left of the front entrance and made his way upstairs, turning down the hall, whose panoramic glass windows faced straight toward the sea, and into the master bedroom where he knew she was likely to have settled. The sound of waves crashing against the shore in the middle of the night was the only sound that penetrated the air.

From the doorway of his bedroom, he could see her form sprawled out on the bed, buried between mountains of pillows, her red hair fanning out wildly like flames. A smile tugged at the corner of his eyes. He wasn't really sure what he would say when she asked why he was here but they had spent enough time skirting past the elephant in the room. Not wanting to wake her yet, Harvey made his way quietly to the bed and sat on the edge. The moonlight seeped into the room through a crack in the shades that covered the glass panel wall. It wasn't much light but it was enough that he could see creases in her forehead and a frown that indicated that even in sleep, she was not at ease.

Harvey spotted a box of tissues on his night stand and a pile of used ones already gathered in a trash bin on the floor beside the bed.

"Asshole," Harvey muttered under his breath as his mind drifted to Stephen Huntley, what he presumed could only be the source of Donna's current state. If he hadn't already had him locked up, Harvey would be willing to go for a round 2 win with that British prick.

He noticed Donna shudder in her sleep, the crease on her forehead deepened and she knitted her eyebrows tightly together. She must have been in the middle of a dream, he thought, and clearly it wasn't one she would mind being let out of.

"Donna…," he called out softly, not wanting to startle her.

* * *

_She stared into his eyes, his cold unfeeling lying eyes. The eyes that had been so inviting to her before were now her prime source of fear. They were the eyes of a killer, her killer. She attempted to move but it was an effort in vain as she was tied tightly in the chair._

"_Donna. You know," he began, the voice that seemed so velvety and smooth before was now like a constant grating in her ears, "I meant it when I said I never meant to hurt you."_

_Stephen Huntley held the glistening blade in his hands, tossing it back and forth with each step he took toward her._

"_But you just couldn't stay out of it, could you? You just had to help your precious Harvey and think you had bested me. Bet you never expected me to walk as a free man again did you? I told Harvey he may know people in the States but that I know people all over the world. He should have listened," he said as he lightly traced the tip of her blade against her jawline._

_Donna sat paralyzed in fear. Fear that one false move would cost her everything. She never thought it would come down to this. It seemed unreal but there she was, tied down, restrained, with no one to help her and nowhere to go. She could feel the tears begin to burn behind her eyes and her heart thudded uncontrollably in her chest as the threat of the knife loomed over her life._

"_It's a shame really," he continued, "We could have been so good together, Love. But you couldn't leave it alone. Tell me Donna, where is he now? Where is your beloved Harvey Specter? Where is he when you need him the most? Where is the man that you've put in first place so often?_

_He stopped and stared her down for a moment as a wicked smile played on his lips as he considered the answer to that question himself._

"_Oh I see it now," he said with a snakelike hiss, "He's with Dana Scott isn't he? You did that for him, you protected her in order to make him happy. Well, well, you really are his loyal lapdog aren't you?"_

_Anger now boiled beneath her skin but her fear kept her from speaking._

"_No matter," he continued before she had a chance to respond, gripping her chin in his hands, tilting her head up to face him, "The best part in all of this is that I'll be shooting two birds with one stone. Getting rid of you will also get rid of Harvey Specter for good, because he will never be able to survive the guilt. Enjoy taking that thought to the grave, Love."_

_The eyes that bore into her were calculated, calloused, and lethal. How had she not been it before? How had she been so blind?_

"_What is it, Love? Cat got your tongue? Come on now, Donna, make this a little fun for me. Donna Paulsen, the woman with the sharpest tongue and queen of witty banter is going to go down as quiet as a lamb?" _

_Her voice caught in her throat once again and she felt muted. She noticed Stephen frown slightly before the evil smirk found its way back. She saw him approach her now, armed and ready, going in for the kill. As the panic rose she felt the screech erupt from her throat._

"_NO! Nooooo!"_

* * *

"Donna!" Harvey cried out louder now as she flailed around, a clear punch to his gut in the process.

"No! No! Please, Stop!" she continued screaming hysterically, as tears streamed down her face, "Please don't! HARVEY!"

Concerned, Harvey moved quickly, pinning her arms down to keep her from throwing any further punches.

"Hey, hey, relax," he said softly, in an attempt to soothe her, "Donna, relax. It's me. Harvey." He repeated this a few times as he felt her tension subside. He loosened his grip as she seemed to come around.

"Harvey?" she asked confused, now waking and getting her bearings straight, he could feel the pulse in her wrist work its way back to a steady pace as she came to.

She blinked her eyes a few times and he watched as she focused in on him.

"HARVEY! Jesus Chri—you scared the crap out of me!" she yelled sitting up quickly, slamming him angrily with a pillow, "What the hell were you thinking?!"

"I was thinking that maybe you've been having a rough time this past week and decided to make sure you were doing ok," he answered dodging a throw pillow that came flying at his head.

"Clearly I was way off base," he added sarcastically, pointing to the box and trash bin of tissues and their current state.

"It's fine! I'm fine, Harvey!" she replied in a huff as she grabbed the box and threw it in the bin along with the already discarded ones.

He cocked his head to the side, studying her, before moving closer as he reached out and gently wiped the tear tracks that had left streaks on her face. The touch made their eyes lock on one another for a brief moment.

"Really?" he asked incredulously, lifting his thumb off her face, "This is you being fine? If it is, then I'm afraid to ask what you're like when you're not."

She rolled her eyes at him and gave him a tight smile, swatting his hand away to wipe her face clean.

"Ok, Harvey, seriously, what are you doing here? Are you already terrorizing everyone within two days of my absence? Do I need to come back to work?" she asked impatiently, attempting to sway him from the topic at hand. He decided he'd give her a minute and drop the subject but he would make sure to return to this conversation later and get to the bottom of what could have rattled her to this state.

"Well I may have given some people a hard time. But no you are not to come back to work until next week, that's an order. I told you, I came to check on you. Took a few days off myself to unwind."

Now it was her turn to eye him skeptically. She reached out and pressed her hand to his forehead as he now rolled his eyes at her.

"No fever. So you're not visibly sick. No hot bimbo trailing behind you," she said looking behind him dramatically, "Who are you and what have you done with the real Harvey Specter?"

"Donna—," he started, in that warning tone that he knew would spark a debate between them.

"Harvey," she responded in the same tone, cutting him off, "We are in the middle of the dissolution of a merger. You can't possibly be taking any time off! I know you're worried about me; otherwise you would never have forced me to take a break during all this chaos. But Harvey, if that's why, I promise you that I am—."

"Fine?" he finished for her, "Yeah, I know, I heard you the first time. But that firm has been standing long before I came along, I think they can handle a few days without me. Sometimes there are more important things to take care of."

Even in the dark he noticed a slight blush creep into her face as she looked away from him.

"Besides they know where to find me if it's not," he added for good measure in case she decided she had a rebuttal.

She stared down at her hands for a moment and then moved her gaze back to him, her lips pressed into a thin line as she considered his response.

"I'm not 15, Harvey. It's not the first time I've had a guy disappoint me," her voice firm but her eyes betraying her feigned confidence.

"I know," he answered softly, wondering to himself how many times he may have been the one to put that look of disappointment on her face.

"I'll be okay," she reassured him but from Harvey's perspective it sounded more like she was trying to reassure herself.

He decided right then and there as he stared at this woman, this gorgeous woman that he'd had by his side for so long and spent so much time chasing the wrong ones that he had been blind to see her for everything that she was, was one that he never wanted to disappoint. He never wanted to be the reason to see the look of disappointment in her eyes.

As strong as she was, Donna was still in a fragile state and Harvey recognized this. He'd have to time this out and not approach it with recklessness. She had broken her rule for Stephen and she wasn't likely to do it again, not after all this, and most certainly not with him.

"I know. So let's go," he replied simply.

"Go? Go Where? It's 1 AM!"

"I don't know, outside, get some fresh air," he said standing up from the bed and stretching.

"Harvey, it is 1 AM! Do you think this," she said framing her face, "stays gorgeous by its own accord?" she shot back with some of her usual fire.

"I bet it does. Besides that's the thing about vacation, you can get all the beauty rest you claim you need tomorrow. Come on now, Paulsen. Where's your sense of adventure? Are you wimping out on me already?"

He knew that was all it would take to spark her competitive nature and he knew he had succeeded when he saw the light flicker in her eyes. She threw off the covers and stood up to his challenge.

"You're on, Specter!" she said sizing him up.

He noticed now how much taller he really was when she wasn't wearing those ridiculously high heels. He attempted to keep his eyes on hers but found it difficult given the surplus of skin and scarcity of clothing on her. The dark green silk camisole covered just enough to leave a man wanting more and clung to every curve of her body.

Donna rolled her eyes, an all-knowing smirk on her face as she pushed him aside and sauntered toward the bathroom.

He threw his hands in his pockets watching as the green fabric swayed teasingly, exposing her toned and slightly tanned legs. A wide grin spread across his face. There it was, he thought, that beautiful fiery redhead excitement that always bubbled inside her that had been reduced to a low simmer with the events of the past few weeks.

"Wipe that grin off your face, Harvey…Or I'll do it for you," she said without turning around.

But his grin only grew wider. He loved that about her and realized how much he had missed that over the past few weeks. Ever since he had found out about her and Stephen, their dynamic had taken a sharp detour. He only hoped that this was the path not only to getting it back but making it stronger than ever. But to really make amends for it he knew there was something he had to do first.

"Meet me outside," he shouted heading back downstairs as she closed the bathroom door behind her.

* * *

Hope you enjoyed! Stay Tuned!


	3. Chapter 3

Donna stared at her reflection in the bathroom mirror. She did a quick spot check; eyes- slightly puffy, nose- shade of pink, face- positively pale.

"Traitor tears," she muttered under her breath with a sigh.

She washed her face and pushed the thought away. It was nothing some good cucumber slices and some nice sunshine couldn't fix in the morning. A shuffling from the deck out below caused her to move over to the window only to see Harvey rummaging through the storage closet on the back deck. She tried to subside to the constant fluttering that was abuzz in the pit of her stomach. Unfortunately it was an involuntary side effect of Harvey's presence at times like this. She wasn't sure why he was here; after all, outside of work and work-related events, they rarely spent time together, especially time alone. Of course she knew that he cared for her and she understood that the way he expressed his concern was different than most but she knew how to decode it…usually. The Hermes trip, brunch, and even the time off, it surprised her but it was done in typical Harvey fashion. His presence here however was way beyond the boundaries of what she was accustomed to from him.

She took in a deep breath and shook away any thoughts that threatened to break the surface, particularly thoughts that she had worked damn hard to push away and stifle.

Donna made her way out of the bathroom and pulled on a pair of black yoga pants and a fitted gray tank top. She didn't care what Harvey said, it was 1 AM and he had just interrupted her sleep; it was not her best hour to look fabulous, it was the best hour to be comfortable.

After another 15 minutes, Donna felt as though she had calmed her nerves enough to make it downstairs. She made her way down the hall with "The Wall"; it was her favorite aspect of this whole house. It originally began as a long blank wall but slowly it began filling with pictures of memories, happy memories. She loved this house; it had an inviting cozy and cottage-like feel to it despite all its modern design. It was glamorous by all means, it was Harvey Specter's after all but it had something more that she always felt was missing in Harvey's clinical bachelor pad in the city. Both looked like they belonged in a design magazine, in fact, they had been. But this house felt more like a home, it felt lived in and personal. The décor definitely attributed to that. Furniture in taupe, cream, with dark cherry accents, played against the hardwood floors and sunlight that filtered in through the windows during the day. But what really drove all of it for her were the pictures that flooded the walls; seeing Gordon, Marcus, and Harvey smiling out at her in one photograph after another as she passed by. It was something that Harvey didn't have in his apartment. He had artwork, tons of it, but family photos were scarce. She imagined it was painful for him to keep them there.

One particular photo caught her eye though as the woman smiling out at her had a younger but nonetheless identical smile, eyes, and fiery red hair. She was surrounded by the three Specter men, all handsome in their own way. The Specter boys had definitely not drawn the short stick of the gene pool. She remembered this occasion though she did not remember ever seeing this photo. It was the night they had gone out and celebrated her and Harvey's move out of the DA's office and into Pearson Hardman. That had been ten years ago, she thought with a sad smile. So much had changed since then.

"There you are!" Harvey said as he rounded the corner and the top of the stairs, "I was starting to think you fallen asleep again up there. I was going to-"

He stopped short when he noticed what had caught her attention.

"That's a good picture," he said softly.

"Yeah, it was a good day," she agreed, "I don't remember ever seeing this picture before though. I'm sure I don't have a copy of it."

"No, I don't think you do. Marcus dropped it off last time he stayed here. He told me he had added a little something to The Wall."

"Oh," she said as she kept her eyes focused on the picture in front of her. Donna could feel Harvey's gaze fixed on her.

She turned slowly to face him.

"Everything okay?" he asked with concern, eyes on hers.

"Yeah," she responded, almost a little too quickly, pushing him back toward the first floor, "Get moving before the sun comes up!"

She took him in, noticing he had changed into a fleece crimson Harvard jacket and a pair of light gray club shorts. It brought a smile to her face. Seeing Harvey dressed down from his usual suits was a foreign sight but it also brought out a more relaxed and at ease version of him that was always a welcome sight.

Following Harvey, Donna made her way out onto the back deck. It was a clear night out but the air was cooler than she had expected. She stopped at the steps of the deck that led down to the beach when she spotted the setup. Harvey had moved the fire pit out to the beach, a steady bonfire building; a picnic blanket had been set down on the sand along with a few other items she couldn't make out. She felt her heartbeat quicken and inwardly scolded herself for it.

"You coming, or what?" he called out from the beach, his voice commanding her attention.

She made her way down, letting the sand squish between her toes. As she approached, she noticed the items on the blanket that she hadn't been able to distinguish before and eyed Harvey suspiciously. She spotted her can opener, the set of thumbtacks, the Macallan (_of course_, she thought), two shot glasses, and a can.

Feeling her pulse quicken, Donna turned on Harvey with her eagle eye.

"All right, Harvey, what's all this about?" she questioned.

"Well, I was thinking that we never celebrated us making managing partner."

"We didn't make managing partner, Harvey. You did," she responded with slightly more bitterness in her voice than she had intended as she recalled the day she had walked into work seeing his name on the wall by the elevators. The fact that he hadn't shared it with her had felt like a slap in the face.

"No," he said, looking her square in the eye, "_We_ did. Because I'd never have made it anywhere close without you there with me. Donna, I'm sorry, I really…"

"Harvey, you don't have to apologize," she responded with a tired voice.

"Yes, I do," he said forcefully.

"I was too busy being an ass to you and I am sorry. It wasn't the way I wanted all this to start," he continued and bent down picking up the can opener and holding it out to her, "But maybe we can fix that right now?"

She raised her eyebrows and let out a long sigh considering his apology with her usual dramatic flare before breaking into a warm smile and snatching the can opener from his hand.

"Don't let it happen again!" she threatened with mock seriousness.

He smiled easily at her now, "Wouldn't dream of it."

"Good! Now fill those glasses," she ordered.

He obliged and poured out two glasses of the malt scotch as she plopped down onto the blanket. Harvey handed her a glass and took his place next to her.

"Ready?" she asked, looking at him, an easy smile and a soft light in his eyes that made her heart skip a quick beat.

Harvey simply nodded in response.

"What am I aiming for? What's the target?"

"Hmm, how about this?" he said standing up and walked back to the deck, returning with a rustic watering can that often held hydrangeas that she'd pick when she went out on walks while she was here, and set it down on the sand about eight feet away.

"All right, game on" she said opening up the box of red thumbtacks, taking the first and aiming it skillfully at the watering can, smiling victoriously when she heard a light clink from the bottom of the can.

"Lucky shot," Harvey said taking his place beside her once again.

"Lucky shot, my ass. Don't start your bitchin' already Specter, we're only getting started. Drink up!" she responded, her competitive edge kicking in, making him smile.

Their tradition wasn't anything crazy. When you came down to it, there wasn't much you could do with a can opener and thumbtacks but it was their ritual nonetheless, a secret they shared, a world that belonged to them and no one else.

The game was quite simple really. It started out with a box of thumbtacks and the objective was to shoot as many of them into the "basket"(trash bin, sink, shoe…they were pretty flexible on the definition of the basket based on where they were). For each thumbtack one scored, the other had to take a drink.

When the thumbtack box was empty, the count began. Many times it was pretty clear: whoeverslurred the most at the end had probably had a bit too much to drink and was likely not the winner. But there were days when it was too close to call and so the count was performed. Of course they couldn't be hammered at work so when they had quickie celebrations they would bring only half a dozen tacks or so.

When all was counted, they would take the can opener and remove the entire lid off a can. Another ritual Harvey developed was grabbing one of Louis' pretentious items from the pantry in the kitchen. On one side they'd write the date and what they were celebrating. On the back the winner would get to write a future dream (or goal, as Harvey liked to call them). Once again, the more intoxicated they were, the more ludicrous the goals and dreams became. The lid was then deposited into a locked box that neither of them had reopened yet. They had decided at some point that they would go through and read them all but neither had decided when that day would be.

They probably had over a hundred or so in the box by now and Donna had lost track of all the items she had written down, especially since many were not written in her finest hour of sobriety.

"So where did the can come from this time?" Donna asked.

Harvey held up the can to face Donna, revealing a label that read '_Take this and you will get Litt Up!'_

Donna laughed and Harvey smiled widely.

"I can't believe he hasn't had cameras installed in that cabinet yet," she said lightly chuckling thinking of Louis.

Harvey attempted tossing a green thumbtack toward the can only for it to fall a few inches short. And so the game went on but not without some banter as to whether or not it counted if the thumbtack landed on top of the can rather than inside it. It did not, Donna ruled. Harvey responded to this ruling by landing his next shot straight and clean into the watering can and she rolled her eyes at him as she picked up her glass and shot down the liquid with practiced ease. Fifty thumbtacks and maybe a couple too many drinks later they had finally ended their game.

Donna stood up, feeling the buzz of the alcohol on her brain, and giggled a little as she tried to keep from toppling over as she made her way to pick up the can to start the count.

"Easy there Weeble Wobble, I think we clearly know who won this round," Harvey said grabbing her by the waist steadying her.

She wasn't sure if it was the just the alcohol messing with her judgement or if it was the feel of his hand on her waist, the firm hold, his fingers just beneath the hem of her shirt, electrifying her skin. She wasn't quite sure but supposed it was a mix of both that everything seemed so blurry and yet so vivid all at the same time. It was as though had a heightened awareness of all her actions and everything surrounding her but would have no control over them.

They were close, closer than either had allowed themselves to be in a long time.

"You good?" he asked softly and she could feel his warm breath in the space between them. The question reeled her mind back into a cognitive and rational state.

"Yeah," she replied nodding, quickly recovering, "I'll feel even better when I prove to you that I kicked your ass this time."

He released her, letting her plop down back onto the blanket. She could still feel the warmth where his hand had been moments before.

"You forget," he said with a humorous glint in his eye, "I'm Harvey Specter, I always win."

She poured out the tacks from the watering can and began separating them into two piles, greens and reds.

"Hey Harv," she said gently, looking up at him, "thanks for all of this."

He stared back at her, eyes soft but serious as he nodded slowly. She held his gaze for a moment too long and then quickly turned away and began counting the thumbtacks.

A cold breeze blew through the beach and Donna's skin gave way to goose bumps. Apparently this did not go unnoticed by Harvey who pulled off his jacket and wrapped it around her arms.

"So," he began, taking a seat back on the blanket beside her, "IF you think you won, what are you writing down on that lid?"

Donna paused in the middle of counting and looked at him blankly as this thought truly crossed her mind for the first time.

What was next for her? Had she ever even succeeded at accomplishing one thing she ever wrote down, one thing that was truly for her and only her? She had spent so long helping Harvey reach his goals that hers always took a back seat and now she wasn't sure if any of her dreams were attainable anymore. What did she have to look forward to now? They had done it, Harvey was a managing partner now but what was she? Still his assistant—the same as she was one, five, and ten years ago. But her dreams, ones that involved being a wife or a mother someday, or a broadway actress, or of just finding someone who loved her as much as she loved them, those were fading quickly now.

She felt a shudder course through her body that had nothing to do with the cool air outside.

What was next for Harvey, she thought. For so long she had made his goals hers as well but how long would she, could she, keep doing that? She'd gone as far as practically setting up the playing field for a happy life between Harvey and Scottie the minute she got the confession from Stephen. It was the right thing to do though, she thought again, Scottie was innocent in all this. Yet a knot formed in her stomach now, as she sat here with Harvey, and thought that she was still working his goals and even making some for him without even realizing it, without him realizing it either. Was she really going to set up his love life for him and watch as he lived happily ever after with someone else and she could just be an old spinster aunt who babysat his kids?

For a brief moment, she thought she had found it, in Stephen. She thought she had found a man that she could come to love more than she loved Harvey but she had been sorely mistaken there. So much for not making mistakes, Donna thought bitterly. She tried to push the gut-wrenching feel away. She was Donna, she was awesome, and she knew everything…everything about Harvey, a voice said in the back of her mind. She felt angry at herself now. These things weren't supposed to happen, these feelings were supposed to go away. These thoughts fluttered through her mind in a blur. She blinked back the tears that threatened to form and focused back on the thumbtacks in front of her, quickly hiding some red ones in the pocket of the jacket.

"Well?" he said waiting for answer.

"I guess we'll never know," she responded, putting on her best game face, "you won."

Harvey eyed her suspiciously. She felt the heat rush to her face. They knew each other too well and there wasn't much they could hide from one another. But she could hide her feelings a little better than he could, after all she'd spent ten years doing just that. Instead of questioning her though, he turned and grabbed the can and can opener from behind him and handed it to her.

"Well, will you do the honors then?"

She grabbed the two items from his hand and set the can down and began opening it. She felt her hands trembling slightly and held her breath to steady them. Removing the lid entirely, she wiped it clean and handed it to Harvey, who continued to watch her carefully.

"Allright, do your thing," she said handing him a marker.

Donna watched as he scribbled on the front and the back of the lid. She found that she didn't really want to know what he wanted next in his life. If it was another major career move, she was afraid he'd be someone who could never be happy with what he already had. If it was a move in his personal life, she wasn't sure she would have the strength to help him achieve it.

"Hey Harv," she spoke, voice hoarse, "I'm a little tired. I'm going to head in to bed now."

Harvey looked up at her as she stood and followed.

"You feeling ok?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Maybe just a little too much Macallan and not enough food in here," she lied with a weak smile, pointing to her stomach.

"Ok, well if you need anything, just let me know," he said not entirely convinced.

She nodded and made her way up to the house.

"Goodnight Donna," he called out after her.

"Goodnight, Harv," she said, stopping and turning, "And thanks again."

With that she turned and quickly made her way into the house leaving Harvey standing alone in the breeze on the beach by the fire.

* * *

Hope you all enjoyed this...Stay Tuned for what comes next!


	4. Chapter 4

***Harvey***

Harvey watched as Donna made her way up the beach and disappeared into the house. He picked up some of the scattered items, throwing them into a box. Grabbing the watering can, he emptied out the tacks and walked down to the shore, filling it with water. Making his way back to the fire pit, he poured the water onto the fire and watched the black smoke rise and the fire died down, entranced by the coals as they turned from bright white, to flaming red, and then down into a charcoal black.

With a long sigh he strode back slowly up to the house. He thought of Donna, his mind plagued by what plagued hers. She had let him win, he thought. She never let him win. So why, he thought, had she snuck a few red tacks into his jacket pocket when she thought he wasn't watching? In the moment he had thought about calling her out on it but when he remembered the panicked expression on her face when he had asked her what came next, he realized that he wouldn't get any answers by antagonizing her or attacking her motives. Donna often criticized Harvey about the walls he put up that wouldn't let people in but he had learned a thing or two about her own defensive maneuvers. Donna Paulsen, though she was passionate and expressive, had learned to build up some sturdy defensive walls herself that were hard to break through. There were many things to talk about, many things to discuss, things that were better off being said with clear heads, sober minds, and open hearts. Tomorrow would be a new day for a fresh start he thought.

Harvey walked into the house, setting down the box on the kitchen counter. He shut off the lights in the kitchen, catching a glimpse of the time on the oven, 3:00 AM. He made his way up the stairs toward the bedroom, feeling the weight of his exhaustion fall upon him like a heavy blanket.

As he rounded the corner, he collided with Donna, her belongings in hand. She muttered a curse under her breath as she dropped her bag. Harvey bent down quickly to retrieve it, holding onto it when she reached out to take it from him.

"And where do you think you're going?" he asked confused.

"I'm just moving into the guest room," she said quickly, attempting to snatch her bag back which only provoked him to hold it out further away from her reach.

"Yeah, I don't think so," he said matter-of-factly.

"Harvey," she said, her voice rising slightly as frustration seeped into her tone, "If I had known you were coming, I would have settled in the guest room from the start. But you are here now so you can have your room."

He tilted his head to the side, raising his eyebrows in disbelief, as if waiting for her true explanation.

"Come off it, Donna. You have never had any qualms with boundaries in using or sometimes even lending what is mine…whether I'm around or not."

She rolled her eyes and attempted to move past him toward the guest room but he blocked her path.

"Donna," he said firmly, moving his eyes and nodding his head toward his bedroom before shifting his gaze back to her.

She stood her ground however and just stared at him in return, unwavering.

"You may possibly be the most stubborn woman in world, you know."

"I won't apologize for who I am," she said, a small smile threatening to tug at the corner of her mouth and he knew he had won her over.

"No," he said smiling and grabbing a hold of her shoulders and turning her around, "you won't. And because you won't, you and I both know you aren't the kind of woman to concede the master bedroom to me, even if it is my house. Especially not when we know how much you love the closet space and the jets in the tub in the bathroom in there. So why don't you stop being such a hardass, turn around and stroll right on back to where you came from."

Harvey grabbed her suitcase from her hand and followed her into his master suite. He set her bags down in the closet, observing how she had neatly folded his sweater and placed it on top of the dresser in the closet.

"All right, you're all set. Now that you're done being difficult try and get some sleep," he said as he came out into the room to find her sitting on the edge of the divan set in the corner by the window. She nodded without looking up at him.

He considered whether or not to leave her, and choosing not to push her any further he turned to retreat to the guest room.

"He's always there," she said so softly that he thought he had imagined it. Turning back to face her, he found that she was now looking up at him.

"Stephen," she continued softly and he felt himself tense at the mention of the name, "he's always there. Every time I close my eyes to sleep. I can't shake it off. He was a murderer and a killer, and in my dreams, I'm always his next victim."

Harvey's eyebrows were now knitted together furiously as he moved closer to her. She looked away now as he stood in front of her, toying with a button on a throw pillow in her lap. Crouching down so that they were at eye level with one another, Harvey stared at her quietly for a moment before speaking.

"Is that what that whole episode was about earlier?" he asked gently, pointing to his bed, not breaking eye contact with her.

Donna nodded slowly and silently.

"Donna," he said firmly but with tenderness, "Stephen is gone. He's locked up and he can't hurt you. And you know Cameron Dennis as well, if not better, than I do. He's got his man, and there is no way he'd ever let Stephen escape his grasp."

"I know Harvey, it's stupid, and it's ridiculous," she said looking away now, "Sometimes it's just hard to control what creeps into your head in the middle of the night."

Harvey nodded his head in understanding, knowing all too well about dreams that plagued your subconscious.

"It's not stupid," he said, "and I'm glad you told me. And Donna, I don't care where he is; Stephen will never come near you again. I'd kill him before that would ever happen."

* * *

***Donna***

Her head shot up at his words and as he made that promise she could see that he meant every word of it. Before she could muster up a response, Harvey was back on his feet. He moved over to the wall unit on the opposite side of the room, rummaging through the shelves until he found what he was looking for.

"I think this may help," he told her as he held up the record sleeve, pulling out the vinyl from the shelf and setting it on the record player in the room. Harvey loved his records and believed that every room he walked into should house a record player. His office had one, his loft in New York had one, and in this house, he had two; one in his room and one in the common room downstairs. In fact, he was so adamant about it that one year he gifted Donna with one so that she could experience music "the way it was meant to be heard."

A slight crackle from the record player broke through the air before a soft smooth melody took over. Donna settled into the bed, sitting up, pulling the covers over her legs as Harvey sat and propped himself against a pillow beside her and handed her the record sleeve. As she listened to the soothing sound of the saxophone, she looked down at the worn and yellowed sleeve and let out a small gasp when she saw the picture on the front. A man slightly younger than Harvey, with similar eyes and smile, cradled a baby boy in his arms, a grin from ear to ear spread across his face. Above the picture in small font the words "Harvey's Lullaby" were printed.

"That's your father?" she asked.

Harvey nodded, "And that's me," he said pointing to the little baby in Gordon Specter's arms.

"I never knew you had this," she said, surprised that she had never come across this record in his collection before.

"Well, I guess it's not one I've ever really shared with anyone. I never kept it at the office" he said softly, looking directly at her now.

She looked over at him and understood. This was the first time he was sharing this with someone else. It was a strong reminder of his father's love and he kept it close to heart. He didn't keep it at the office because it was probably a painful reminder that his father was gone. They sat there in silence for the remainder of the first song. Though neither spoke, the silence was welcomed and not awkward. It was probably the first true moment all day that Donna had felt truly at ease. This was them, this was what they did. They could sit in complete silence, just enjoying the company that the other provided, listening to his records. It was truly the most beautiful thing Donna had ever heard from Gordon and that was saying a lot as he was a very talented musician.

"I didn't come across this until about 5 years ago, after he passed," Harvey said, his voice thick now.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I know he played it to me all the time when I was a kid and then somewhere along the way he stopped and I never knew where the song came from or where it went. A few weeks after he passed, Roy, one of his buddies from the jazz club called me up and said he wanted to meet up with me. He handed me an envelope with this record in it. He told me that my dad had been keeping it, waiting for the day I had a son or daughter of my own to hand it down. He said he wanted it to be a surprise."

Donna felt her heart break into a million pieces for him but resisted the urge she had to reach out and touch him.

"Why didn't you tell me you had this?" she asked tenderly, bumping his shoulder with her own.

He shrugged without much conviction but from the look in his eyes Donna knew. She always knew. So without another word she leaned her head on his shoulder, closed her eyes and listened quietly with him. After another long moment of silence she heard him speak again.

"Did you know, every time he called, he'd ask me why I hadn't come to my senses yet and married you? He'd threaten to do it himself if I didn't…" he said with low chuckle.

"…He really loved you," she heard him finish softly.

Donna felt her heart thud in her chest. Though her eyes wanted nothing more than to instinctively pop wide open at his words, she forced them to remain closed. She tried steadying her breath, keeping a rhythmic and leveled pace. She wondered if she was a good enough actress to pass off that she had fallen asleep. Though she was able to keep her eyes closed without squeezing them too tightly and the breathing remained relatively steady, she was sure that he could feel her heartbeat pulsing through her entire body and if not, then she was sure that the thoughts that ran loudly through her head could be heard for miles and miles.

"Donna?" he called out when she didn't reply. Instead of responding she simply leaned further into him, pretending to retreat into sleep. She heard a low sigh from Harvey and expected he'd withdraw to his guest room but instead she felt him settle in next to her, his hand lightly playing with a loose strand of her hair. She felt chills rise up her spine and her stomach had more knots than a cat's cradle.

Of course she knew, all too well, what Harvey was saying but it surprised her that he'd ever acknowledge it. Often, when Gordon would call the office, he'd spend a few minutes speaking to her before being transferred to Harvey. He was a charming man, a trait both his sons had inherited aside from their good looks. But while Harvey had developed a steel armor that kept people from getting too close, Gordon Specter wore his emotions on his sleeve. He expressed his feelings freely and had not let the disappointments of his past affect his genial nature. Gordon Specter was not a man led by bitterness and cynicism but rather by a love for life and for his sons.

As she kept her eyes glued shut, Donna recalled her last conversation with Gordon, only two weeks before he had passed.

"_Well if it isn't my favorite Red!" he greeted happily at hearing her voice on the phone._

"_Well if it isn't my favorite of the Specter," she returned light-heartedly._

_"How's it going, Darlin'? Has my boy still not come to his senses yet and snatched you up?"_

_"Oh, you know me, just busy being awesome. But don't be so hard on him, it takes a whole lot of man to handle a Paulsen," she replied with mock seriousness._

_His guttural laugh exploding from the other end of the line._

_"Well then in that case, I just may have to step up to that challenge myself."_

_"Careful Gordy, you shouldn't tease a woman so! I'm not one to be trifled with," she responded sternly before breaking into a fit of laughter._

"_Sweetheart, I love my son and I am mighty proud of his accomplishments in his career but when it comes to matters of the heart, that boy can be as stubborn as an ass. If I was still his age, and had a woman like you around, there's no way in hell I'd be letting you roam that city as a single woman. He's a fool but I'll tell you, I am glad he has you in his life. You give me hope that someday he will allow himself to truly be happy in his life, where it really matters. You take care of him."_

"_Always," she responded with a bittersweet feeling inside her._

"_All right Darlin', you take care. Now put him on so I can see if I can talk some sense into that thick head of his!"_

Somewhere in the middle of this memory, Donna felt the weight of sleep overcome her and her slumber charade slowly drifted into a deep sleep as the thoughts melted away.

* * *

Stay tuned!


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry all for the delay….it has been a hectic time of year…

***Harvey***

Sunlight filtered in through a crack in the shades, coming in at just the right angle to align itself with Harvey's eyes. He tried shifting to avoid the ray of light but felt some additional weight on his left shoulder that kept him from moving with ease. He opened his eyes and spotted her, still there, her fiery hair tousled over his arm. He smiled at her nestled peacefully at his side, her expression no longer pained and perturbed as it had been the night before.

Donna stirred beside him, turning to face him, blinking her eyes a few times as if she were trying to bring him into focus, trying to remember where she was.

"Morning," he said, a gentle smile in his eyes as he stared at her disheveled form. There was something about seeing her this way that Harvey loved. In his opinion, many a woman could look good when they threw on some makeup, a pair of heels, and a form-fitting dress. But a rare few could captivate him when it mattered the most; in the morning when he woke up beside her, when the haze of alcohol was gone and she was in her most natural form. Donna was one of those rare few for him. If he had to wake up next to one woman for the rest of his life, he was sure he wouldn't mind waking up to her.

Donna closed her eyes again and rubbed the sleep out of them before answering.

"Hey," she responded groggily, as she stretched and slowly inched away from him, the movement not going unnoticed by Harvey.

"So how does it feel?" she asked through the middle of a yawn.

"How does what feel?" he asked, confused by her question.

"You know, actually sleeping with a woman. Waking up next to her fully dressed and being fully dressed yourself," she responded with some of her typical pluck, "We both know that concept must be as foreign to you as a snow day in Florida."

The words stung if for no other reason than that it served to remind him of how many weekend conquests and flimsy flings had been unintentionally dangled in front of her over the years. How many times had she needed to reschedule and cancel his meetings because of all the nameless faces he'd been caught up in bed with? For the first time ever Harvey was ashamed of his bachelorhood reputation. But he had made his bed and lied down in it so he had no choice but to grin and bear it.

"Well, we can still change that," he said with a mischievous grin plastered across his face as he tugged at her arm and pulled her back into him, his eyes challenging her. She was dangerously close now; her body and breath warm against his skin. Her eyes, wide and alert, found his as he came to the conclusion that his resolve to take things slow with her was decreasing at an exponential rate.

***Donna***

They were inches apart. They were in bed. They were in bed and inches apart. Donna's attempt to process this rationally was fruitless as her thoughts were like the word jumble puzzle of a Sunday newspaper. How had they arrived here, at this point, at this moment? If they got any closer it would be hard to tell where he ended and she began, she thought. It took all her will power to not throw caution to the wind and act on the desire that ignited within her. It was as though a light flame that had tapered down had suddenly spun out of control to become a raging wildfire. She had worked long and hard over the past ten years to quell the feelings that threatened to break her every now and again, and she'd be damned to go and ruin it now in a moment of weakness. Stephen had left her with a longing that she didn't know she had; a longing to be with someone who she could trust wholeheartedly. To her dismay, the man in front of her, the one man she learned to trust wholeheartedly, was not available to her. Donna knew that one wrong move right here right now would produce consequences of irreparable damage. She felt like she no longer would possess the strength to once again abate the feelings that would come to life if she opened up Pandora's Box.

"Harvey," she said, her tone threatening, "Don't go starting any trouble, Specter!"

"I can't bail you out if you do!" she added for good measure.

"Maybe I don't want to be bailed out," he added suggestively, though as she looked into his eyes she didn't see his usual glimmer of jest but instead a resolute sincerity that made her pulse quicken.

In her best attempt to remain cool, calm, and collected she rolled her eyes at him and gave him a playful shove before climbing out of bed.

"Allright, I'm going to shower," she said attempting to put an end to his game.

"Hey, I'm not picky," he said, "Bed, shower….I can work with either one."

She stopped in her tracks and turned back around to him with a glare only to find that impish grin back on his eyes and lips. Before he could react, she picked up a throw pillow and threw it at him, nailing him right in the face. She smiled with satisfaction.

"You're incorrigible!" she said and turned back toward the bathroom.

"I know but you started it," he said with a smile plastered across his face.

She shook her head and let out a small laugh as she shut the door behind her.

Finally, in the privacy of the bathroom, she leaned back against the closed door and let out a long, slow and shaky breath.

"_What the hell is going?" _she whispered under her breath.

"Hey, Donna!" Harvey called loudly from the other side of the door. The voice so close startled her causing her to bang her head and elbow against the door with such force that it brought tears to her eyes.

"Owww!…Son of a-" she cried out.

"Everything all right in there?" he asked.

"Yes," she cried through a labored breath as she opened the door, rubbing the back of her head and wincing at the pain that was still shooting up her arm. Harvey stood on the other side with a humorous look on his face.

"You sure?" he asked, conquering the urge to laugh.

"YES!" she hissed with annoyance, mostly at herself for being this spastic around him but partly at him with his self-satisfied shit-eating grin.

"If you say so," he said with some skepticism, "Anyway, I'm going to run out and grab some things to make breakfast. Need anything?"

She stared at him blankly for a long moment. Had she entered some alternate universe when she hit her head? She could swear she heard Harvey say he was _making_ breakfast. Though the words made sense, the person the words were coming from did not. Surely he meant he was picking up breakfast.

"Donna?" he called out, noticing she had spaced out.

"Huh? I'm sorry, can you repeat that? I just thought I heard you say _you_ were _cooking _something."

"I did," he responded casually.

She stared at him again with a stone-faced expression for another few seconds before breaking out into laughter.

"You're kidding, right? You? Cook? I thought the extent of your culinary skills included burning water."

"No, that would be the extent of _YOUR_ culinary skills," he returned subsiding her laughter, "So, do you need anything?"

"Um...No," she responded, still surprised by this revelation, "anything is fine."

"Ok but try not to hurt yourself in there while I'm out," he called out, amusement saturating his tone, as he headed out through the bedroom door.

Donna shut the door to the bathroom behind her once more and moved toward the shower. She turned it on and moved to the sink as she waited for the water to get warm. As she brushed her teeth she couldn't help but let her thoughts drift to Harvey again.

She couldn't quite understand his behavior. Something about it reminded her of their time back at the DA's office. It was unguarded, carefree, and potentially reckless if she wasn't careful. She supposed he was just trying to be nice after everything that had happened with Stephen, yet she wished it didn't stir up so many emotions within her every time he smiled or every time they touched.

She had lied to him, to Scottie, and even to herself when asked if she was in love with him. The truth was she had tried not to fall in love with him because their relationship would always be too damn complicated to ever work out.

So instead she had told herself a little lie each and every day, hoping that someday it would be true, that someday her heart wouldn't want what it couldn't have. And some days it was easier to believe that she had succeeded. The closest she had been to succeeding had been Stephen. She didn't think she loved Stephen but felt like it could have grown into love eventually had things been different. But days like today showed her that she hadn't quite gotten as far as she hoped she had. Hoping to clear her mind, she hopped into the shower to indulge in a long hot bath.

It was nearly an hour later when she made her way downstairs to the kitchen. Halfway down the hall she could already smell the aroma of good things. She felt her stomach growl and realized how hungry she was. After how much they had to drink the night before, food was exactly what she was craving right now.

Entering the kitchen she noticed Harvey at work. He had already chopped up some fruit for a fruit salad and was now busying himself with julienning vegetables for an omelet. She watched as he sliced the onion with such accurate precision, a motion that could only be perfected through much practice. How had she never known about this side of him? He set aside the onions and moved on to dicing up some ham, again with quick precision.

"Lawyer by day, chef by night?" she asked, observing him still.

He looked up and smiled at her, finally realizing she was there.

"Well, you know, just trying to add as much items to my resume of excellent qualities."

"So…brains, cooks, and cash?" she asked lightheartedly.

"You also forgot really really ridiculously good-looking," he added with a grin.

"Oh silly me, then I guess I also forgot stubborn and narcissistic," she returned.

He threw a grape at her but grinned wider nonetheless.

"So what else have you got cooking in there?" she asked nodding to the oven and taking a seat on the stool at the counter across from him.

Without another word, Harvey turned around and pulled out a tray from the oven and laid it out in front of her. On it were four golden and glazed blueberry cream cheese Danishes. She looked at him with disbelief.

"You did not make these!" she cried out.

"Did too," he said with an unapologetic smile. She returned that smile with a look of simultaneous awe and annoyance.

She reached out grabbing one from the tray and took a small bite of it and stopped setting it down, shaking her head.

"Damn it," she muttered.

"What is it?" he said watching her, his smile fading.

She sighed heavily and looked up at him, "I was hoping it would taste terrible. We both know you don't need yet another reason to inflate that ego."

"Sorry to disappoint you," he chuckled turning to the frying pan as he began preparing their omelets.

Ten minutes later Donna found herself sitting at the table out on the deck as Harvey brought out their omelets, fruit salad, coffee, and what remained of the Danishes that Donna hadn't already devoured. There was a nice cool breeze coming in off the ocean. The sun bright against the clear blue sky felt warmed her cheeks. She watched as Harvey checked his emails on his phone.

"Heading back to work today?" she asked.

He looked up at her, setting his phone back in his pocket.

"No, I told you, I took a few days off."

"Yeah, which for you is typically like one day," she returned, cutting her omelet with the side of her fork.

"Well then I guess you can say I'm on an extended vacation. Besides, you say I terrorize everyone when you're not there anyway, so I figured I'd give them all a break."

"Hmmm…so generous of you," she deadpanned.

"In fact," he continued, "I think that after breakfast, I'll just go for a run on the beach. You in?"

Donna looked at him with a look of pure horror.

"Run? On vacation? Uh, no thanks…besides, I've got a date this morning."

His head shot up immediately at this, "A date?"

"Of course," she began casually; the tension in his muscles was not lost on her. He always did that, she thought, every time she mentioned a date.

"Yes…a date…with the sun, sand, and shore" she finished innocently, pretending not to notice.

She noticed his shoulders relax as she completed the thought and chuckled to herself at how easily his mood shifted. At the same time that it humored her, it often infuriated her how his mood could shift so abruptly with her and with others every time she was seeing someone new.

After breakfast Donna cleared out the dishes and made her way upstairs to change into a swimsuit. It was a little too cool in the year for a swim but the day was just perfect for a little sunbathing, she thought. Changing into a two-piece emerald green bikini, she put on some sunscreen, threw on a cover-up and made her way back downstairs. She didn't see Harvey anywhere in the house and imagined he had already gone off for his run. She grabbed a magazine from the shelf in the living room and a towel from the closet on the pool deck and walked down to the beach. A little ways down from the steps she spotted the place where they had been the night before with their bonfire. She pulled on her sunglasses and took in a deep breath of the fresh sea air. It was much different than in the city. Realizing she forgot to bring down a beach chair, she ran back up to the house to grab one from the pool deck. As she rounded the corner, she collided with Harvey who was just coming out of the house. She let out a startled yelp.

"Jeez, Harvey!" she exclaimed holding onto her chest, "you scared me! I thought you were out on your run already!"

"No, just heading out now," he replied calmly. It was then that Donna noticed that he was holding her at the waist.

"You've been so jittery lately, Paulsen. What's got you off your game?" he teased with his wicked smile.

"I just like to know what's going on around me," she said in a huff and pulled herself away from and busied herself with picking out a chair.

"But you're Donna Paulsen, I thought you always knew," he continued in jest.

"Well, your creeping about is messing with my omniscience. Besides my omniscient powers are on vacation for the week too."

Harvey let out a good-humored laugh, grabbing the chair that she now carrying and taking it down to the beach for her, setting it down in her desired location.

"Well, I'll stop creeping and get on with my run. Can you watch my phone, take a message if anyone calls?" he asked.

"Oooh…I'm sorry but Donna Paulsen is out of office this week. Please leave a message after the beep. Beep."

He tilted his head and gave her his best 'Please Donna' look. He had learned a thing or two with Mike on that. She rolled her eyes at him knowing she wouldn't be able to say no and he smiled knowing she wouldn't say no.

"Fine!" she conceded.

He smiled and dropped his phone in her hands and took off down the beach. With that, Donna took a seat in her chair, laid back, and began flipping through the magazine in front of her.

***Harvey***

As he ran down the beach, Harvey's thoughts drifted back and forth between Donna and the resistance his legs received from running on the softly packed sand.

Every minute that he spent with Donna was another minute he realized that he wanted this. He wanted a life with her, to wake up next to her every day, to have her be the first person he spoke to every morning. He wanted her in every way possible. This wasn't him acting on impulse. This had been a story 12 years in the making.

Her situation with Stephen made this whole thing complicated at best. Even if she had feeling remotely close to what he felt for her, there would still be a lot of resistance on her part. He supposed it was a good thing that he liked a good challenge. He needed to put the wheels in motion but nothing so drastic and aggressive that would scare her off.

As his calves and thighs burned with each step into the sand, he decided to turn around and head back to the house.

***Donna***

Harvey hadn't been gone fifteen minutes when his phone rang the first time. Jessica Pearson. She was skeptical about answering at first but realized that if Harvey had asked her to take his calls, then Jessica was likely aware of Harvey's whereabouts.

"Hi Jessica, its Donna," she answered.

"Donna, how are you?" the managing partner asked sincerely.

"Oh, I'm doing OK, thanks. But I'm guessing you didn't call Harvey to inquire about me," she said.

Jessica laughed and then let out a sigh.

"I wish that was what I was calling about. Unfortunately, I think my discussion with him may be a little more complicated. Is he not around?"

"He's out on a run," Donna responded, "he should be back soon. I can have him call you."

"Thank you, Donna," Jessica said as she hung up the phone.

The second time his phone rang Donna was 100 percent certain that the caller was not aware of Harvey's whereabouts.

Donna stared at the name flashing on the screen of the phone in her hands. _Scottie._ No, she was absolutely sure that Scottie had no idea where Harvey was. She considered answering it but knew that by doing so she could inadvertently ruin whatever Harvey had going with Dana Scott. Harvey deserved to find some happiness and if it was with Scottie then she would not get in the way of that. Scottie was suspicious of Harvey's relationship with Donna as it was, she didn't need to complicate matters by answering his phone while he was on vacation. She let the call go to voicemail. Though she knew she was doing what was best for Harvey, the thought of Scottie and him together gave Donna a tight feeling in her chest.

Harvey had been gone nearly an hour before Donna spotted him making his way back up the beach in her direction.

"Hey," he said, somewhat breathless as he plopped down on the sand beside her.

"Hey," she responded with some forced enthusiasm, "So, Jessica called, she said she had a rather complex subject matter to discuss with you. I told her I'd have you call her back once you returned. And Sco…"

Before she could finish the rest of her sentence he turned to look at her though and said, "Hey, how about we go grab some dinner tonight?"

She looked at him and could see that his eyes held meaning in the question. Suddenly she felt rather naked in her two piece bathing suit and reached for her cover-up.

"Umm…and Scottie called," she answered instead.

She watched him carefully but he just held her gaze. Not a flinch and no reaction at the sound of her name.

"So…dinner?" he asked again.

She couldn't remember a time where Harvey had passed up an encounter with Scottie, other than the time he had found out she had cheated on her fiancé with him.

"I'm sorry, did you hear what I said?" she asked still a little bewildered.

"Yeah…did you hear what I said?" he countered easily.

"Yeah…" she said slowly, still trying to put the puzzle pieces together.

"And?" he asked expectantly.

"Dinner?" she asked looking over at him and he nodded gently, a small smile on his lips.

She began nodding slowly before answering, "Yeah OK...dinner then."

"Great," he said smiling at her and standing up, "Now let me go call Jessica back and see what fire I need to put out."

Donna watched as he made his way back up to the house. She sat there dumbfounded for a while. She wasn't quite sure what had just happened. Had she just agreed to go on a date with Harvey?


End file.
